Looking to be loved?

03/03/1991, Jakarta, Indonesia

I am sitting on the couch looking at the straight line of the smoke rising from a petchouli stick burning in a jar on my table.  The music is Angel Love of Aeholia bringing the waves of peace and "let go" to my mind.  The fragrance of petchouli reassuring me of presence of warmth and love all around me.

Just a while ago hearing a love song hit my mind and triggered my sad memories. Sad because I keep falling into the trap of my own illusions about love.

I remind myself that if we are looking to see whether we are loved or not, in that instant it is impossible for us to love.  One should not expect love but be the source of love.