YOU ARE WHAT YOU SEEK....

If the faceless face of the beloved is what you seek
Look within, you are what you seek

You have taken the outward path, many times
Take the inward path, this one time

Knowing the address to the house, a comforting thought
But when you arrived, it was empty was it not?

If you found the garden where is the flower?
If you found the house, where is the owner?

Your search for the external god, fulfilling, but no avail
To reach the beloved, look within, you are the veil!

RUMI

#Lookwithin

OUR TRUE LIFE

Birth of the morning by Yuriyshevchenko

It's January, the start of a new year in my actual existence although many believe that, as souls, we never leave the world in order to come back, moreover, no one knows how to come back again!

Early on at the start of this month I challenged myself with a question - does love guide my every action in life? I was inspired by Kahlil Jibran the poet, philosopher and artist who asks - who among you does not feel that his power to love is boundless?

I have been observing myself day by day to find out where do I stand, and it has been a difficult task to judge myself and be totally objective about it.

In my observation I recognized the "self" at the forefront in everything that I did and everywhere that I moved. That's where I learned that in many instances I was actually pre-occupied with judging the situations as good or bad and getting carried away by trying to maintain the good and happy, and avoid the sad or unhappy.

I learned that even when I was worried and concerned about other people I was in fact stabilizing the position of the "self" in controlling my behavior and forcing me to declare my unhappiness. The big question is, how could I love or be loving in all my actions when most of the time I am busy  judging the situations or worrying about it which in fact it is a kind of feeding the "self". In those moments I was indeed inhibited to be there with my whole being and with my complete attention and love.

The whole experience was an eye opener for me and I realized that in life situations I just have to be there with boundless love instead of trying to judge everything and move up and down riding the waves of my emotions.

That is what RUMI my favorite poet has said about our true life:

As you start to walk out on the way,
the way appears.
As you cease to be,
true life begins.
As you grow smaller,
this world can not contain you.
You will be shown a being
that has no you in it.  

#ourtruelife

THE ENDING YEAR.....

I am looking back at the year which is almost ending. The months, the days and the moments which are gone. I have been alone but in touch with my essence which is my soul. I focused on my intentions at every given moment of time and that helped me face my fears and learn from them.

My life events in the past year have enabled me to stay in touch with people, to learn from them and to develop a strong sense of recognition and discernment in everything that I do. Although the connection has mainly been through social media and within a virtual world but the mutual impacts are undeniable.

At the very early stages of my life I already learned that everything that happens to us is meant to educate us in amazing ways, and due to that understanding, my world kept expanding and I started to see myself standing among millions of people from all over the world who were just like me. The thought of oneness brings tears of joy to my eyes and a sense of freedom from the "me" bringing back the RUMI's words of wisdom to my mind:

Be a melting snow,
wash yourself from yourself.

A white flower
grows in the quietness.
Let your tongue
become that flower.

As time has passed I have become more eager to better understand and study myself in thinking, feeling and acting. I know that self-knowledge has no end and I have been using my life as a vehicle to learn to live in harmony and appreciation of the wholeness of life.

The tranquility is gradually setting in, something that I know is not of the mind only but it is an active transformation within me. I have become more conscious of the activity of "me" especially when I am upset, impatient, feel bored or depressed. Could this "me" be forced out? I have learned to deal with it by getting help from the creativity within me but without clinging to the outcomes or getting addicted to the applause or the rewards.

I move forward by focusing on my intentions instead of worrying about the outcomes. I face my fears by being patient and unattached to my expectations and by being creative and innovative. I navigate though the difficulties of life without giving up my goals allowing for authentic transformation and empowerment.

STRESS OR DISTRESS? SEVEN BEST WAYS TO COPE!

Stress is simply resisting what is, and the resistance can produce exhaustion, high blood pressure, visual difficulties, headaches and more. If it goes above certain levels, we can become prone to diseases. 

Experts believe that stress is a “non-specific response of the body to a demand”. The body responds to stress by going through the stages of alarm, resistance, and exhaustion. Psychologists and spiritual teachers believe that resistance is the operation of ego which prevents letting go of holding on to ourselves. The result is obsession with an issue and continuous suffering.

According to the International Critical Incident Stress Foundation, stress is followed by physical, cognitive, emotional, and behavioral reactions. The reactions can be acute, chronic, or delayed but no two people are likely to experience the exact same combination of reactions to any given stressors. When stress becomes prolonged or frustrating it becomes a distress. Distress is always followed by acute physical or mental suffering.

Stress is with us all the time and it is unique and personal to each of us. It is so personal, in fact, that what may be relaxing to one person may be stressful to another. The American Institute of Stress has an inventory of stressful life events which is worth checking it out and using it for yourself or others accordingly. http://www.stress.org/holmes-rahe-stress-inventory/

There are 43 items on the above mentioned scale with different point values. The life event with the highest point value of one hundred is the death of spouse. The event with the lowest point value of eleven is minor violations of the law. You can add up all the points you have within the past 12-18 months in order to find your stress score. The scores are interpreted based on the available guidelines in the stress scale document.

The steps to deal with stress are as follows:

1. Explore and expose your stress by asking yourself what is it that I am resisting? What is it that is not working for me?
2. Acknowledge your stress and retreat with acceptance. Don’t try to be right rather than being objective and considerate of the existing facts.
3. Dissociate from the problem by taking a break and doing something different.
4. Make it easier for yourself by not staying alone and by sharing your concerns with close friends.
5. Deal with your stress by decreasing the load of your work and by making time for some relaxation, reflection, walking meditation and similar activities.
6. Discipline yourself, cry if you need to, and avoid self-medication.
7. Ask yourself why am I in this situation, what am I learning? Your answer to this question is the key to your healing.

#dealingwithstress, #stressinventory, #distress

http://www.stress.org/holmes-rahe-stress-inventory/

THIS STORY MAKES YOU SMILE!

Hassan Al Basra a notable theologian and scholar (642-728 C.E.) was asked by one of his followers to talk about his teachers. He said - I have had many teachers but three in particular gave me the most valuable lessons of my life:

The first lesson I learned was from a thief. One night I got lost and I had left my house key with my neighbor. I didn't want to wake him so I asked for help from a by stander and he opened the door to my house in a split second. I was surprised and I asked him to teach me how he did that, he confessed that he was a thief. I was baffled but to show him my appreciation I invited him in. He stayed with me for a month but he left the house every night and returned in the morning. Every time I asked him if he got anything he would say – no but hopefully tomorrow! He seemed to be content and he never complained. What I learned from him was patience, persistence and hope.

The second lesson I learned was from a dog. One day I was thirsty and I tried to drink water from a river close by. A dog that was seemingly thirsty joined me but every time he tried to drink he was frightened by the reflection of his own image in the water. Finally, he threw himself in the river and drank fearlessly.

The third lesson I learned was from a little girl who was carrying a lit candle. To make conversation and to teach her something I asked her if she lit the candle by herself and if she knew where the flame came from. In response she started to laugh and put out the flame by using the palm of her hand, then she said – Sir, do you know how the flame disappeared and where it is now? I felt embarrassed and I kept thinking that we all have a sacred flame in our heart and we don’t know where it comes from.

On that day I decided to connect with life and everything that was around me including the clouds, the trees, the rivers, the woods, the men and the women. I have had thousands of teachers and I have learned how to light a flame in my heart and how to be a student in the University of Life. I have learned great lessons from simple things in life.

#connecting, #flame, #hope

ON BEING TOLERANT

The word tolerance was first used in the 15^th century and the concerted efforts of many led to the adoption of article 18 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights by the United Nations in 1948 which states – everyone has the right to freedom of thought, conscience and religion.

Helen Keller once said “The highest result of education is tolerance”. This is so true that even the spirit of democracy means liberty of choice for human beings. That’s why we can not export democracy to other countries because if the individuals have had no real education about tolerance they can never behave democraticaly within a family unit, a community or a society.

Tolerance is defined as:

• “A fair, objective, and permissive attitude toward those whose opinions, practices, race,    religion, nationality, etc., differ from one’s own’.
• “Freedom from bigotry or stubborn and complete intolerance of any creed, belief or opinion  that differs from one’s own”.
• “Understanding and recognition of rights and beliefs of others”.
• “Enduring, bearing, permitting, and supporting of those who don’t share our opinions”.
• “An attitude of mind that implies non-judgmental acceptance of different life styles or  beliefs. Toleration also implies “putting up with something that one disapproves”.

Examples of those who are not tolerant include but is not limited to the following persons, no matter which side they are coming from:

• Those who think they are on a mission to change others because they are right about everything.
• Those who think if they own a business they also own the people in it.
• Those who try to attack the character of the person who disagrees with them.
• Those who intentionally and publicly ignore and disrespect the person who does not go along with them.
• Those who have a racket and continuously complain about how wrong everybody else is.
• Those who want to prove that others are on a wrong track because it differs from theirs.
• Those who are judgmental and cannot honor the rights and opinions of others

You can add your own examples to my list in the comment section of this post.

The questions are:

1. Can we look with fresh eyes at every person we meet?
2. Can we focus on the wholeness of other face with an attitude of openness?
3. Can we listen to people with no prejudice?
4. Can we take a higher stance and uplift others instead of dismissing them?
5. Do we realize that loving others is not just a question of being nice to them and we need to communicate with specific intention and focus?

After all, this is a connected universe and cynicism does not work. We have the power to share kindness, respect, understanding and awareness with others in order to initiate creative collaborations.

#Tolerance, #Intolerance

HUMANITY: WHAT IS POWERFUL AND WHAT IS NOT

Humanity as virtue or moral excellence is defined as “a set of strength focused on tending and befriending others”. Humanitarianism is defined as “an ethic of kindness, benevolence, and sympathy extended universally and impartially to all human beings”. It is also described as “the acceptance of human being for plainly just being another human, ignoring and abolishing biased social views, prejudice and racism in the process, if utilized individually as a practiced view point, or mind set”.

The synonyms for humanity are listed as compassion, fraternity, fellow feeling, philanthropy, kindness, consideration, understanding, sympathy, tolerance, etc. The admirable qualities of human beings are mentioned as ability to be humble, selflessness, awareness of themselves, willingness to learn, ability to express happiness for others, having confidence in the face of uncertainty, honesty, unconditional empathy, knowing that they don’t know it all, having a sense of personal style, having unforced gratitude, having respect for other human beings, ability to hold great conversation, not taking stock in appearances, having admiration but not jealousy for those who are capable, having understanding even for those who act out against them.

Our identities as human beings are the results of actions we perform including what we speak which is considered our linguistic actions. Being mindful of our human qualities will allow us to become less critical and judgmental of ourselves and others, have deeper appreciation of who we are, and be less self-centered and more willing to look around and take care of others. In other words, what we think becomes a function of who we are as human beings.

Here is a set of distinctions which point at examples of what is human and powerful: 

1. Making requests for what needs to happen instead of keeping quiet with loads of expectations in our mind.
2. Accepting what we cannot change instead of becoming resigned or resentful.
3. Being mindful of the choices we make and taking responsibility for the consequences.
4. Having a sense of humor and trying to put people at ease.
5. Being open to learning and not pretending to be a “know it all” and arrogant.
6. Making grounded assessments instead of opining and gossiping.
7. Making responsible complaints instead of bitching about everything.
8. Asking questions instead of having ready-made answers for everything.
9. Sharing what we have personally witnessed instead of talking about our own stories.
10. Accepting accountability instead of blaming it on others.
11. Telling the truth instead of denial and sugar coating.
12. Being vulnerable instead of trying to control everything out of fear.

Considering the above, one can conclude that what we say or do can be powerful and a function of who we are as human beings, or it can be totally fear-based and out of dis-empowerment.

#Powerful, #Distinctions